Wednesday, March 16, 2011

past or new chapter?

aku tk paham ngn diri aku skang ney.CONFIUS.BUNTU.PENING.Apeh kputusan yg perlu aku wat?
dia or dia?sumpaa aku pening sangat2 ney .y.allah tolong la bagi aku petunjuk n hidayah..aku perlu kn ia sangat sangat skang ney.aku da tk dapat nk pk pape n wat pape.aku takut aku sala pilih jalan idop...

Monday, March 14, 2011

Torn Between PISSED... And Heartbroken...

Basically, I’m in tears. Tears of rage, pain, agony, all these feelings. I don’t even WANT to see ANYONE right now. Having your dream slashed, torn, burned, and broken in front of you is an awful sight. I don’t even know what to do anymore. Restricting me from the one thing I can actually do right?… The one thing I’m good at?… The only thing I love to do?… The only thing that comforts me?… It’s like chains. Chains, shackles, and weights. I can’t be bolted, tied, and locked in this damned cell all my life. I’ve got the chance right here, and I’m going to take it. I have to break out. But seeing as you just sealed another escape, I’m not going anywhere for a long, long time. Somebody please. Help. Rip down the panels and help me get back to where I want myself to be. Because here… Everyone thinks I’m nothing but another stupid girl… I’m nothing here…


I just want to be loved.
I just want to feel like there is some reason for me to continue living.
I just want someone to be laying down in bed next to me.
I just want to feel safe and secure and wanted.
I just want YOU

i want to be dat .plis ?

i want to be that girl...
that you can be with.
that you can trust.
that you can imagine being with.
that you want to love.
that you will never let go of.
that you can trust to give secrets to.
that you can take your parents to.
that you want to marry.
i just want to be that girl 

heartbroken says...

Those were the days yeah? The days when our responsibilities didn’t seem so overwhelming. The countless times we’ve cried only because we got a boo boo or didn’t get that new toy. We were too young back then to ever realize or ever begin to understand the pain of a broken heart. We had no clue what it was like to love. When we were little, the only people we associated with the term “love” was our family. The days whencooties were the reason boys stayed away from the girls. With so little an understanding, it never occurred to us how good we had it. Those were the days that we didn’t even know we were truly living for. 
Then as we got older, we discovered the tremendous ache our hearts could have for a single person. We found out that pinky promises still meant the world to us… and meant even more to be kept. Yet, we learned that no one ever really kept them. We lost sight of who we were and became too focused on the person we thought we “loved.” We put so much effort into making something work, in the end to have it all knocked to the ground by the person we thought was everything. We discovered the potential to love, and with it, also the potential to be broken.
Then as we got wiser, we made it more difficult for people to earn our trust. We started to build up these walls around us just to see who cared enough to push them down. We became more cautious with others. Our own friends and even the new people we came across. We convinced ourselves that we would never be good enough for anyone. We doubted that we had the kind of self worth to even be considered special by someone else.
Eventually at a much later time, we healed. We healed and learned how to love again. To love again in the hope that we wouldn’t go through the vicious cycle of being heart broken all over again. 
We’re all in search for love. We’re all waiting for it too. We are all hoping that we cross paths with that one special person who will love us as we are. Honestly and genuinely.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

serious nk nie !

omg,sumpa gilea nak niee!purple lak tuh..bila la ek aku nk dpt this purple things?wat ever it is..aku mesti nak n dapat kn dia!gileaa doe.cantek sangat..sangap purple doe aku ney!hehe.tunggu.